who we are instead

welcome back!

2005-12-21T07:58:00.000-06:00

We returned from our annual vacation to Walt Disney World the Sunday after Thanksgiving. I was looking forward to returning to my ministry responsibilities. Monday morning, the firestorm hit.

Tensions among friends, students, whom I pastor, making poor life choices. One thing after another and it continues relentlessly even as I write this. These are the times that I want to grow back my hair so I can pull it out.

Then, in the midst of all of it I hear the words of Charlie Hall's song from his CD "On the Road to Beautiful:"

I can see that my hands are trembling
I can see that my legs are weak
I can see that my head is spinning
But I will overcome
And I know that my heart is hurting
And I know that my soul it aches
And I know that it seems I'm failing
But I will overcome

Oh, Lord I'm strong in You
Oh, Lord I'm wise in You
Oh, Lord I can see in You
So I will overcome
Oh, Lord I am loved by You
Oh, Lord I am free in You
Oh, Lord I'm complete in You
So I will overcome, I will overcome
I will overcome

I've listened to that song many times before. But I never felt the power of the truth in that song until the last few days.

These things will pass. But, thankfully, His love for me will renew and strengthen me to get through this.

flight of the bumblebee

2005-11-15T08:40:00.000-06:00

i'm sitting here counting the days until i go to my very favorite place, walt disney world.

now, for me, it's not just about entertainment. it's much more than that. walt disney is a personal hero of mine. his ability to bring out the best creative talents in the people around him is unmatched.

one time, long after he established himself as a creative icon, a little boy asked disney if he drew mickey mouse. he replied in the negative. then the child asked if he made all the movies. "no," was the reply. the little boy then asked him what exactly he did do.

disney replied that he was like a bee that went around pollinating creativity among the people around him.

i like that.

my hope is that my legacy will be that i inspired the best in the people around me. as a pastor, my greatest accolade that those with whom my life intersects will be moved toward a deeper passion for Christ.

time will tell...

baby, you can drive my car

2005-11-03T11:22:00.000-06:00

i had a dream the other night.

i was in the backseat of a driverless car that was swerving out of control. i was trying desperately to get into the front seat in an effort to get behind the wheel to keep it from hurting people or crashing into anything, not to mention getting killed myself. but, i couldn't get to the front.

an unseen person was holding me back, preventing me from helping get things under control. i was very frustrated and fearful.

finally, i awoke moaning, in a cold sweat.

if anyone out there has any thoughts on this, post a comment.

Church is burning

2005-10-24T16:04:00.000-05:00

on the most recent david crowder cd, "collision," there is written inside the following statement:

"this recording and artwork are protected by copyright law. using internet services to distribute copyrighted music, giving away illegal copies of discs or lending discs to others for them to copy is illegal and does not support those involved in making this piece of music, especially the artist. by carrying out any of these actions it has the same effect as stealing music."

on worship leader charlie hall's latest cd "on the road to beautiful" he more directly states, about burning cd's:

"it's hurting the artists who created the music. it has the same effect as stealing a disc from a store without paying for it."

bottom line, guys, burning cd's is wrong, not just because it's against the law, which scripture has a few things to say about, but also because it's unethical.

we can discuss the philosophical aspects of this matter all day long, but at the end of the day, burning cd's is still illegal and something, as louie giglio rightly points out, christians should be the first to refrain from.

to refer to louie giglio again, he believes that this is one of the more visible issues where followers of Christ forfeit their witness to the watching world. i agree. maybe we can be among the first to set an example, rather than give in to rationalization.

let's not forget guys, that this is how these guys make their living. i have seen many Christian artists give their music away. we must remember, however, that, like any other field of work, it's up to the creator of the product to perform their work gratis, not the consumer. would any of you who work or create a service of some sort be willing to allow the consumers of your services to decide whether or not they wanted to pay you?

i'll close with these words from james 4.17:

"Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it."

a good brisket sandwich

2005-10-18T12:57:00.000-05:00

I feel as though I should be writing at this very moment, but about what I'm not really sure.

Sitting at my desk, typing these words and eating a brisket sandwich from Rudy's (where, by the way, you can get the "worst" barbecue), I feel a bit like walking out of my office and just continuing to walk. Don't get me wrong, I'm not depressed, upset, disenfranchised or anything else along those lines. I'm just...curious.

Curious about what lies around the bend for me. Curious about the wonders that never seem to cease to come my way. Curious about this God who, as one writer put it, has "a furious love" for me.

As I sit here, all 5'9.5" and 180 pounds of me, and I wonder about the vastness of the space we live in, I'm astounded, flabbergasted, breathless that the God who is even bigger and incomprehensible than that thinks about me; all 5'9.5" and 180 pounds of me. Even cooler than that is that He feels exactly the same about you. Right here, right now.

Suddenly, this sandwich tastes very, very good.

growing up

2005-10-06T14:00:00.000-05:00

i was taking my kids to school yesterday and had a interesting conversation with my 10 year old son. he said that he was bothered because his friends at school saw him as the “best behaved” boy they know. he went on to tell me that they always want to do what he does because they know he’s such a good guy. he told me that he just wanted them to see him as normal.

i sat there listening to him, wondering when he started to be so “self-aware.” of course, this is one of those parenting moments that i’m sure will come more frequently in the years ahead.

i started out telling him that having a good reputation is the most awesome thing someone can have because no one can take it away from you. continuing, i told him that having other kids want to be where he is could be a sign of being a leader and that he should embrace that.

of course, i couldn’t resist telling him that being a well-behaved boy really is the norm and that he should embrace that!

ah, to be a child again. i was talking with my friend john last night and we recalled those days of our lives when innocence permeated our souls. with the realization of his reputation comes the possibility of seeing other options. yikes! what do i do when he starts to realize that having a good or bad reputation is really up to him? i guess i’ll have to see. one thing is for sure…it won’t be boring.

it's still all about Jesus...

2005-09-23T09:31:00.000-05:00

i've been reflecting on matthew 26 as of late. Jesus is in a home and a woman breaks open a jar of expensive perfume to anoint and honor Him. the disciples get a bit ticked off about this, claiming that the perfume could have been sold to help the poor. Jesus replies by saying:

"Why berate her for doing such a good thing to me? You will always have the poor among you, but I will not be here with you much longer. She has poured this perfume on me to prepare my body for burial. I assure you, wherever the Good News is preached throughout the world, this woman's deed will be talked about in her memory."
(Matthew 26.10-13, NLT)

isn't that just like Jesus to keep first things first? as followers of Christ we are to first and always be about honoring Him above all things. was Jesus denying the need for us to assist those in need? absolutely not! i can't imagine that the 2000+ references in scripture regarding our responsibility to the poor would be neglected by Jesus. but, i believe that Jesus wanted them (and us) to remember that there must be a heart turned toward Him always, wherever we engage our time and resources.

did you notice that Jesus just had to mention the preaching of the "Good News" in his admonishment to the disciples? a not so subtle reminder that whatever we do, there is an ultimate goal of telling a lost and dying world about the God who loves them and wants to be in a relationship with them through Jesus Christ.

someone asked me what i thought God might be doing in bringing us hurricane rita so closely on the heels of hurricane katrina. perhaps it's God's way of reminding us today what he reminded the disciples about in matthew 26. there will always be physical needs in the world. everyday there are people who hunger, thirst and are without the basic needs for daily living. God directs us to be sure to meet those needs, care for the poor and needy. but, in the midst of it all, don't forget that, in the end, it's still all about Jesus. the story cannot end without Him.

sunday morning

2005-09-19T13:54:00.000-05:00

the church where i serve as youth pastor allowed us to lead yesterday's sunday morning service. most of the service was taken up by the music we do. today it struck me as to why i was so energized by yesterday morning.

i don't know if i'm a musician or not. that's not really what is the critical issue for me. all i do know is that i've been given an ability to strum a guitar and sing with a decent voice. when we, as a band, take the stage, we have one purpose in mind: to make a big deal about God. we don't care about ourselves, but we do care that we hold up this gigantic magnifying glass to God and let people get a good look at Him.

it seems that as we do that, people turn away from self and start to look outward. as they begin to be struck by the presence of an awesome God, they begin to notice what is around them and how they can serve those around them.

funny how that works out.

Where do I start?

2005-09-12T16:42:00.000-05:00

The danger of waiting so long to post something is that people who might otherwise have visited or been keeping up may have lost interest. Nonetheless, here it goes.

So much has happened since my last post. The war rages on, national disaster, the loss of the Chief Justice...most importantly, on a personal note, was the death of my mother-in-law, Brenda.

That single event became the catalyst for a number of changes in my life. I feel a compulsion to not waste the life I have been given. Seize every moment as an opportunity from God to reflect His glory, His grace, His mercy to those around me.

I've taken to being healthier, exercising six days a week, trying to eat better. I'm wanting to be a better dad, husband, employee...I just want to be the person I was created to be and not take anything for granted.

I've got a good...no a GREAT life!

let the truth be told

2005-06-07T01:00:00.000-05:00

i love it when the establishment takes a hit now and then. the upcoming spurs-pistons nba finals series may not be glamorous for the nba suits, but for basketball purists, you couldn't ask for a better series.

too bad the nba brass can't see the great drama in this. two coaches, best friends, going head to head...the last two nba champs battling it out...it's great basketball no matter how you look at it.

let me know who you think will emerge as the nba champs on my poll to the right.

what to say...what to say...

2005-05-27T23:38:00.000-05:00

there are times when i want to write and then there are times when i just don't seem to be able to make time for it.

i'm feeling a bit unsettled right now. maybe it's because i have three students who, several months ago, had signed up to take a mission trip to northern ireland. as of late, they have all indicated trouble they are having trying to decide whether or not to go.

interesting that they are all facing situations that are particularly troublesome for them. it's almost as though someone knew what buttons to push for each of them.

weird, huh?

nba finals just around the corner

2005-05-21T23:58:00.001-05:00

so, who are your picks for the nba finals? i've put a couple of polls on here for you to let me know your picks.

a texas series?

2005-05-20T10:59:00.000-05:00

so, the spurs finally got past the sonics. i liked coach pop's comment that the spurs "escaped" this series. they'll have to step up their game whether they play phoenix or dallas next. so, who do you think it will be? check out the new poll to the right and let me know.

new spurs poll to vote on!!!

2005-05-06T10:28:00.000-05:00

i've created a new poll for the spurs v. sonics series. vote on who you think will win in the poll to the right of this page.

culture isn't the problem

2005-05-03T14:35:00.000-05:00

ever since i decided to follow Christ, way back when, it seemed as though there was a problem with most churches not connecting with the people it attempted to reach. it always seemed like one had to pass some kind of test to get into the "club" or enact some sort of shift in thinking to really "get it."

i just read a great article by andy harrington, director of youth for christ in vancouver. in the article, "culture isn't the problem...we are," he discusses why we may be having such a hard time reaching people with the Gospel.

click here to read the article and let me know what you think.

check out my guestmap

2005-04-29T23:38:00.000-05:00

i wanted to explain the "guestmap" icon on the right side of the page, under my photo.

i saw it on a friend's blog and thought it was cool. when you click on it, a map will open up and you can place a "pin" on your location. this gives me a chance to see if there's anyone outside of my immediate area checking out my blog.

i guess it's a little self-serving...but, what the heck!

from hanoi jane to saint jane

2005-04-29T13:36:00.000-05:00

i'm hopelessly addicted to the bravo network show "inside the actor's studio." it's a great way to get beyond the superficial coverage one might find on "entertainment tonight" and get deep into what makes actors tick.

today i was watching the most recent installment with jane fonda. i realize the mere mention of her name causes the blood of some to boil. some hurts run very deep and i can certainly sympathize with that.

but, toward the end of her interview, she was asked about a "philosophical shift," as host james lipton put it, in her thinking.

she responded by saying that it wasn't so much philosophical as it was spiritual. she talked about spending a good deal of her life filling her emptiness with addictions but that, even after getting sober, she was then just a "dry drunk," filling up her emptiness with emotional addictions.

she went on to say that she had begun to interact with christians who were hip and funny and truly lived out their faith. then she boldly proclaimed that she had begun a journey that she never thought possible. she said, "i became a christian."

she went on to talk about how it has helped her understand so much about who she had been and why she had done what she had done. amazing!

it never ceases to blow me away when someone comes to a realization of who they are and their need for Christ. that is always a miracle.

i remember reading recently the words of someone writing about ms. fonda's new book tour and that we should never forget what she did during the vietnam war and certainly should never forgive her.

that's one perspective i suppose. but, let me give you another:

"He doesn't treat us as our sins deserve,
nor pay us back in full for our wrongs.
As high as heaven is over the earth,
so strong is his love to those who fear him.
And as far as sunrise is from sunset,
he has separated us from our sins."
Psalm 103.10-12 (The Message)

the way i figure it, if God doesn't hold her past against her, then who are any of us to do so?

frustrations, part 2

2005-04-28T12:04:00.000-05:00

let me clarify my previous post.

it's true that i don't believe those who are using the filibuster to block the nominations are acting entirely on principle. but, i'm not naive enough to believe that if the party roles were switched the same thing wouldn't be happening.

my bigger frustration in all of this is that i believe i live in the best country in the world, but i'm disappointed with those who are supposed to be our public servants. unfortunately the parties in power often don't seem to be FOR anything. they only seem to be AGAINST each other.

when it all becomes about fighting the other guy all the time, all of us end up losing.

y'all, you guys or you?

2005-04-26T15:37:00.000-05:00

when i was in college, i had friends from all over the country and they thought it was funny that i didn't have much of an accent, having grown up in texas.

i don't really know why i don't. i recently came across a quiz that assesses what "kind" of english i speak. as you'll see, i'm just kind of a plain, vanilla english kind of guy.

Your Linguistic Profile:

80% General American English

15% Dixie

5% Yankee

0% Midwestern

0% Upper Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

frustrations, part 1

2005-04-26T09:26:00.000-05:00

i have to admit to being more than a little frustrated with our friends from the democratic party who are, frankly, acting like children regarding president bush's judicial nominees.

does anyone really believe that the democrats are acting on principle? their actions are so incredibly transparent, i can't believe they actually want us to believe that they are sincere in their statements about trying to uphold checks and balances. all they're doing is using the tool of the filibuster to try and wield the power they have overwhelmingly lost.

i was reading an article in last sunday's paper that laid out the qualifications of all of the appointees. each one, immensely qualified and some highly regarded by the aba. the only real issue is that they are conservative judges who interpret law, rather than legislating from the bench. i absolutely guarantee that if these judges were liberals, they would sail right through.

even the l.a. times today has a headline in the op ed section: NUKE THE FILIBUSTER!

come on, dems, you want to serve your constituents? then get over the fact that you lost last november and let's give these men and women the vote they deserve.

a warrior soul

2005-04-22T02:35:00.000-05:00

i have to admit to being a sucker for quizzes and polls...especially when they help me better understand myself. i was amazed how accurate this one was.

You Are a Warrior Soul

You're a strong person and sometimes seen as intimidating.
You don't give up. You're committed and brave.
Truly adventuresome, you are not afraid of going to battle.
Extremely protective of loved ones, you root for the underdog.

You are picky about details and rigorous in your methods.
You also value honesty and fairness a great deal.
You can be outspoken, intimidating, headstrong, and demanding.
You're a hardliner who demands the best from themselves and others.

Souls you are most compatible with: Old Soul and Peacemaker Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

saved sinners or sinning saints?

2005-04-17T01:17:00.000-05:00

"Confession is so difficult a Discipline for us partly because we view the believing community as a fellowship of saints before we see it as a fellowship of sinners. We come to feel that everyone else has advanced so far into holiness that we are isolated and alone in our sin....We imagine that we are the only ones who have not stepped onto the high road to heaven. Therefore we hide ourselves from one another and live in veiled lies and hypocrisy...."
-- Richard Foster, "Celebration of Discipline"

to add to that statement, sometimes there are believers who, with intentionality, forward themselves as being on the high road to heaven. during my tenure as a youth pastor in florida, there was an assistant pastor on staff with me who was quite the legalist. not only that, he was a "my way or the highway" kind of guy. he was quick to point out sin in others, believe the worst about anyone of whom he was suspicious, raise the banner of sniffing out satan's efforts to infiltrate the church (he often railed against the roman catholic church), all the while painting himself as the model of personal holiness.

i've had other friends who want to concern themselves with who in the Church is "drifting" and "infecting" the Body with doctrinal error and dangerous practices, but ignore real lives and real problems.

this isn't a new phenomenon. Jesus dealt with it 2000 years ago:

"Instead of giving you God's Law as food and drink by which you can banquet on God, they package it in bundles of rules, loading you down like pack animals. They seem to take pleasure in watching you stagger under these loads, and wouldn't think of lifting a finger to help. Their lives are perpetual fashion shows, embroidered prayer shawls one day and flowery prayers the next. They love to sit at the head table at church dinners, basking in the most prominent positions, preening in the radiance of public flattery, receiving honorary degrees, and getting called "Doctor' and "Reverend.'

"I've had it with you! You're hopeless, you religion scholars, you Pharisees! Frauds! Your lives are roadblocks to God's kingdom. You refuse to enter, and won't let anyone else in either.

"You're hopeless, you religion scholars and Pharisees! Frauds! You go halfway around the world to make a convert, but once you get him you make him into a replica of yourselves, double-damned.

"You're hopeless, you religion scholars and Pharisees! Frauds! You keep meticulous account books, tithing on every nickel and dime you get, but on the meat of God's Law, things like fairness and compassion and commitment--the absolute basics!-you carelessly take it or leave it. Careful bookkeeping is commendable, but the basics are required. Do you have any idea how silly you look, writing a life story that's wrong from start to finish, nitpicking over commas and semicolons?"
matthew 23. 4-7, 13-15, 23, 24

it seems to me that too often, even after 2000 years, we "swallow camels and strain at gnats" and forget the words of the prophet, micah:

But he's already made it plain how to live, what to do,
what GOD is looking for in men and women.
It's quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor,
be compassionate and loyal in your love,
And don't take yourself too seriously--
take God seriously.
micah 6.8

love God, love people

They Gathered Together

2005-04-16T01:41:00.000-05:00

Every Sunday we gather with five couples over lunch. We've been doing this for a few months now and they have quickly become our dearest friends. We are "doing life" together, which I have come to realize is what we are created to do. None of us is meant to live life as an island. We are hard-wired to experience the ups and downs of our journey in community.

If Thoreau was right, that "the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation," I am convinced that is only because they have failed to find that community with which to connect, to develop deep bonds of friendship.

Currently, among our group, there are family illnesses, financial uncertainties and struggles, relational challenges. I cannot imagine how we could face these things were it not for this community of people who have been brought together for the purpose of lifting up one another.

whatever you do to the least of these...

2005-04-14T09:30:00.000-05:00

interesting and awesome night with our students last night. i'm in the middle of a teaching series, "jesus at the movies," whereby i take a look at some popular films and point out moments of Truth portrayed in and through them.

last night we were going to take a look at ladder 49, but i felt as though God had something else in mind.

over the last several weeks i've heard of instances of some of our students treating one another really badly -- particularly those who are seen as outcasts, not "cool" enough. this began to trouble me, not because of the reputation of our church or our youth ministry or even me. my primary concern had to do with the reputation of Christ in our community. did we really want those who are made to feel marginalized and outcast to believe that it is normal for followers of Christ to treat them badly?

so, in a moment that was truly Spirit-led, i put aside my plans for the night and taught out of matthew 25.31-46 (i recommend reading it in the message). after reading about jesus' teaching on what we do to the "least" among us, i gave the students an opportunity to pray, that God would reveal to them those times when they have not been attentive to the "least" among them. what happened was incredible. there was such a fresh move of God's Spirit, unlike i have seen in quite some time.

we ended the evening with a powerful time of worship beginning with matt redman's heart of worship.

how awesome it was to get out of the way and allow the Spirit to dictate what needed to be communicated. as the service began last night, i truly had little idea of exactly what i was going to say. i simply told God that i would start moving my mouth if He would do the talking. He directed me to passages of Scripture, gave me the words to speak and it was so liberating.

who knows what long-term effects this will have. i told the kids last night that every now and then we need to do a spiritual "house cleaning" because we let things clutter our souls. maybe we'll do it again down the road. who knows...

a little yeast can screw up the whole loaf!

2005-04-13T00:10:00.000-05:00

why do some who claim to follow Christ seem to be so unaware of the nature of the early Church and seem hell-bent on spending the better part of life on some kind of "witch hunt" under the guise of protecting the Church?

today i was reading an entry on the website of an organization whose stated purpose is to "warn of unbiblical teachings and practices impacting the Church." they've taken a Bible verse out of context and built an entire organization around it. here's the thing, though...

if you're spending all of your time sniffing out what's wrong with the Church -- and believe me, there's plenty there -- when do you have time to see all of the awesome things that are RIGHT with the Church?

if Jesus REALLY meant that this was all as simple as loving God and loving people, then why can't we just do that?

i've just seen God at work in too many of the places and people that our modern-day pharisees want to find fault with. what's even more frustrating is that i consider myself to be a fairly discerning person and have had first-hand contact with many of the things that this organization wants to demonize and have found NONE of the things that they point out. it's as though they're moving in completely different circles from me.

it's funny that the people we read of Jesus getting really ticked off at in Scripture are the people who acted much like some who claim to follow Christ today: always finding fault, looking for fault and error 24/7, looking for ways to catch others in some trap. the parallels are amazing.

don't get me wrong. we SHOULD keep our guard up. but, it should be against those who would seek to attack the true movement of God for the sake of what amounts to nothing more than a modern-day witch hunt.

love God, love people...yep, that'll preach!

in it for the long haul

2005-04-03T11:42:00.000-05:00

went to the core yesterday with a couple of my volunteers. i had taken a few to the one in san antonio a few weeks ago and wanted to give those who didn't get to go then a chance to go this time. one of my big takeaways was how much i love what i do.

everytime i go to the national youthworkers convention i inevitably run into someone who has been a youth pastor for 30 years. those guys are my heroes. i don't want to be a senior pastor, i don't want to move on to something "bigger and better" (that's because there isn't anything better than youth ministry!). i don't even want to retire to do what i really love to do. i'm doing what i love to do and pray that i'll be serving students when i'm old and gray.

this is the life.

more to come...

what i'm looking for

2005-03-30T00:02:00.000-06:00

we complicate things so, don't we?

i decided to follow Christ in 1985. after many years of thinking that i had something to do with becoming like Christ -- not realizing i was usurping the role of the Holy Spirit in all of this -- by trying to live up to impossible rules and regulations, trying to achieve some westernized ideal of what a Christ-follower looks like and failing miserably, i've come to realize the simplicity of what it means to follow Him.

several things occur to me...

we can get a great picture of what the early church was like from my favorite passage of the bible in acts 2. we see the church engaged in community. they were living out Jesus' words.

Jesus boiled down what it means to follow Him to two things: love God and love people. He even said that if we get those two things right, everything else falls into place. after spending 17 (!) years trying to find a local church that embodied the principle of "love God, love people" i was beginning to understand u2's i still haven't found what i'm looking for. then God found me, picked me up from the dust that was my life and placed me in the first place that i have found truly lives out those great words of Christ.

is it the perfect place? no. is it for everyone? not a chance. but it is for me. we are a spiritual halfway house, which is what i believe the church is to be anyway. it's like one of my favorite stories. one of my personal heroes, tony campolo, related this true story that happened to him during a speaking engagement in hawaii:

A few years ago Tony flew to Hawaii to speak at a conference. The way he tells it, he checks into his hotel and tries to get some sleep. Unfortunately, his internal clock wakes him at 3:00 a.m. The night is dark, the streets are silent, the world is asleep, but Tony is wide awake and his stomach is growling.

He gets up and prowls the streets looking for a place to get some bacon and eggs for an early breakfast. Everything is closed except for a grungy dive in an alley. He goes in and sits down at the counter. The fat guy behind the counter comes over and asks, "What d'ya want?"

Well, Tony isn't so hungry anymore so eying some donuts under a plastic cover he says, "I'll have a donut and black coffee."

As he sits there munching on his donut and sipping his coffee at 3:30, in walk eight or nine provocative, loud prostitutes just finished with their night's work. They plop down at the counter and Tony finds himself uncomfortably surrounded by this group of smoking, swearing hookers. He gulps his coffee, planning to make a quick getaway. Then the woman next to him says to her friend, "You know what? Tomorrow's my birthday. I'm gonna be 39." To which her friend nastily replies, "So what d'ya want from me? A birthday party? Huh? You want me to get a cake, and sing happy birthday to you?"

The first woman says, "Aw, come on, why do you have to be so mean? Why do you have to put me down? I'm just sayin' it's my birthday. I don't want anything from you. I mean, why should I have a birthday party? I've never had a birthday party in my whole life. Why should I have one now?"

Well, when Tony Campolo heard that, he said he made a decision. He sat and waited until the women left, and then he asked the fat guy at the counter, "Do they come in here every night?"

"Yeah," he answered.

"The one right next to me," he asked, "she comes in every night?"

"Yeah," he said, "that's Agnes. Yeah, she's here every night. She's been comin' here for years. Why do you want to know?"

"Because she just said that tomorrow is her birthday. What do you think? Do you think we could maybe throw a little birthday party for her right here in the diner?"

A cute kind of smile crept over the fat man's chubby cheeks. "That's great," he says, "yeah, that's great. I like it." He turns to the kitchen and shouts to his wife, "Hey, come on out here. This guy's got a great idea. Tomorrow is Agnes' birthday and he wants to throw a party for her right here."

His wife comes out. "That's terrific," she says. "You know, Agnes is really nice. She's always trying to help other people and nobody does anything nice for her."

So they make their plans. Tony says he'll be back at 2:30 the next morning with some decorations and the man, whose name turns out to be Harry, says he'll make a cake.

At 2:30 the next morning, Tony is back. He has crepe paper and other decorations and a sign made of big pieces of cardboard that says, "Happy Birthday, Agnes!" They decorate the place from one end to the other and get it looking great. Harry had gotten the word out on the streets about the party and by 3:15 it seemed that every prostitute in Honolulu was in the place. There were hookers wall to wall.

At 3:30 on the dot, the door swings open and in walks Agnes and her friend. Tony has everybody ready. They all shout and scream "Happy Birthday, Agnes!" Agnes is absolutely flabbergasted. She's stunned, her mouth falls open, her knees started to buckle, and she almost falls over.

And when the birthday cake with all the candles is carried out, that's when she totally loses it. Now she's sobbing and crying. Harry, who's not used to seeing a prostitute cry, gruffly mumbles, "Blow out the candles, Agnes. Cut the cake."

So she pulls herself together and blows them out. Everyone cheers and yells, "Cut the cake, Agnes, cut the cake!"

But Agnes looks down at the cake and, without taking her eyes off it, slowly and softly says, "Look, Harry, is it all right with you if...I mean, if I don't...I mean, what I want to ask, is it OK if I keep the cake a little while? Is it all right if we don't eat it right away?"

Harry doesn't know what to say so he shrugs and says, "Sure, if that's what you want to do. Keep the cake. Take it home if you want."

"Oh, could I?" she asks. Looking at Tony she says, "I live just down the street a couple of doors; I want to take the cake home, is that okay? I'll be right back, honest."

She gets off her stool, picks up the cake, and carries it high in front of her like it was the Holy Grail. Everybody watches in stunned silence and when the door closes behind her, nobody seems to know what to do. They look at each other. They look at Tony.

So Tony gets up on a chair and says, "What do you say that we pray together?"

And there they are in a hole-in-the-wall greasy spoon, half the prostitutes in Honolulu, at 3:30 a.m. listening to Tony Campolo as he prays for Agnes, for her life, her health, and her salvation. Tony recalls, "I prayed that her life would be changed, and that God would be good to her."

When he's finished, Harry leans over, and with a trace of hostility in his voice, he says, "Hey, you never told me you was a preacher. What kind of church do you belong to anyway?"

In one of those moments when just the right words came, Tony answers him quietly, "I belong to a church that throws birthday parties for prostitutes at 3:30 in the morning."

Harry thinks for a moment, and in a mocking way says, "No you don't. There ain't no church like that. If there was, I'd join it. Yep, I'd join a church like that."

thank God i'm part of a church like that. every week, i'm surrounded by the kind of people who Jesus Christ hung out with and reached out to; the kind of people that would not be comfortable in any of the churches i've been associated with before.

i only wish i could tell bono.

blessed for the journey

2005-03-29T09:49:00.000-06:00

on another blog i had mentioned people who had significant impact on my life...people who, in one way or another, have been a part of my becoming who i am today. some are friends, some are family, some have had great conflict with me, some have encouraged me, some have laughed and cried with me, but all of them have been brought into my life by God to teach and challenge me. i thank God for them and they are worth mentioning again here.

they are: ray and hope lopez, richard and brenda stabell, kirk and lisa winkles & family, jesse samudio, richard martens, eve marie diaz, dora samudio, arlie and noemi francis, bill and molly norris, george billingslea, stacy and jill tyson, david and lee ann hamm, keith hileman, christy hendrix lafferty, carl anderson, darrell bock, elisa bock, mike tomas, billy fryar, sandra miser, joe riegel, michael lambert, michael and judy lehnhardt, rick and holly lyle, renee ryals, shawn and kelly rhoads, john hannah, eugene bengtson, reinhold buxbaum, harry and dawn havery & family, wayne and linda henderson, garret henderson, dawn henderson, martin and kim cardoza, kristine cardoza, erin mcintyre, russell and ginger mcintyre, joanne and rob dilella, katie dilella, susan dilella, sarah dilella, paul and helen shoemaker, mike and joyce knott, hunter holton, dixie holton, donald holton, david saathoff, jim degraw, brent saathoff, staci loalbo, meredith theilen, mandy sedgwick, jason henning, mark richards, jeff coleman, steve and sandra hogue, joanne depew, mike yaconelli, doug fields, paul and charlotte wilson, michael vonderhaar, janice dean, cindy sanchez, janine smithies, nan henke, chris taylor, curt mueller, tj and susan burkholder, doug and kristin burford, frank and denise garibay, justin and kim wolff, david and camey fowler, mike and diana kelley, the rosas family, danielle scott, luis arizpe, lene ballard, john condit, chris vonderhaar, john gilmore, olivia sanchez, katherine mateo. through it all has been the consistent and unconditional love, support and encouragement of my wife since 1987, jennifer, and my kids, ruben and elena.

don't know what life would look like without these people having been a part of it, but i'm sure glad they have been and are.

one great thing

2005-03-25T11:51:00.000-06:00

it's been an eternity since i posted anything.

i'm getting ready for our church's good friday service. it occurs to me that paul wrote to christians in corinth that he "decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and him crucified."

he's going for our lives to be lived with a singular focus, that being the Cross.

now, we get together as a Church every year and recognize that historical reality on good friday, but the truth is that is to be our constant focus. the cross of Christ, the passion, the sacrifice. that is what sets us apart from anything and everything else.

in his book, "don't waste your life," john piper wrote, "the people that make a difference in the world are not the people who have mastered many things, but who have been mastered by one great thing."

what am i mastered by? after spending 20 years of my life discovering what it means to follow Christ -- and realizing that i'll spend the next 20 years continuing that journey -- i hope i'm a little closer to being mastered by the "one great thing" that is the Cross.

masters of creativity

2004-11-30T17:01:00.000-06:00

Just got back from a trip to Walt Disney World. I never cease to be amazed at the level and quality of the creativity of that place.

While I was there, Jen drew my attention to a book (which I couldn’t resist buying), “The Imagineering Way” written by the Walt Disney Imagineers, the creative team behind the company

As I read the intro, words by Walt Disney himself, I was reminded of why he is one of my personal heroes. He did not fear failure or trying things outside of his comfort zone. Elsewhere in the book is written, “Many people never allow their creative abilities to surface because they fear what might happen. They fear failure. They fear feeling silly or inferior. They fear what others might think.”

How many times do we succumb to this fear and “go with what brung us,” stay with the tried and true and never experience the exhilaration of what could be? It is in that place of uncertainty that true creativity begins.

Enough of my words, take a minute to read Walt’s:

“Certainly we have all had [youthful] confidence at one time in our lives, though most of us lose it as we grow older. Perhaps, because of my work, I’ve been lucky enough to retain a shred of this youthful quality. But sometimes, as I look back on how tough things were, I wonder if I’d go through it again. I hope I would.

When I was about twenty-one, I went broke for the first time. I slept on chair cushions in my ‘studio’ in Kansas City and ate cold beans out of a can. But I took another look at my dream and set out for Hollywood.

Foolish? Not to a youngster. An older person might have had too much ‘common sense’ to do it. Sometimes I wonder if ‘common sense’ isn’t another way of saying ‘fear.’ And ‘fear’ too often spells failure.

In the lexicon of youth there is no such word as ‘fail.’ Remember the story about the boy who wanted to march in the circus parade? When the show came to town, the bandmaster needed a trombonist, so the boy signed up. He hadn’t marched a block before the fearful noises from his horn caused two old ladies to faint and a horse to run away. The bandmaster deamanded, ‘Why didn’t you tell me you didn’t play the trombone?’ And the boy said, ‘How did I know? I never tried before!’

Many years ago, I might have done just what that boy did. Now I’m a grandfather and have a good many gray hairs and what a lot of people call common sense. But if I’m no longer young in age, I hope I stay young enough in spirit never to fear failure – young enough still to take a chance and march in the parade.”

-- Walt Disney

broken stuff

2004-11-17T15:17:00.001-06:00

there's an illustration i like to use with people when i'm talking about man's inerently sinful nature. this seems to be where so many people get hung up with the bible. they think that to call them sinful is to somehow pass judgement upon them. it really isn't. it's merely a statement of the fact that we've all blown it...none of us are perfect. we've all fallen short in one area of life or another.

anyway, my illustration is this: imagine that on the day you were born, the doctor implanted a specially devised, digital recording device that has been archiving your every thought, word and deed...everything, even when no one else was watching. now, the device is going to be removed and the recording is going to be played before a room full of your family and closest friends. would you be okay with that?

i know i wouldn't. in fact, if that were to happen, i would likely want to find the nearest tree from which to hang myself.

so, we can agree that we all have this problem of having fallen short. what do we do about it?

the reality is that we can't do anything about it. that's the beauty of the Gospel. we can't fix it. but, God, in his grace and love and mercy, sent Jesus to take care of our problem. all we have to do is be honest about ourselves and trust that Jesus' death at the cross was the payment needed to make up for our offenses.

we're broken stuff that God puts back together. cool, huh?

trouble is...

2004-11-16T16:32:00.000-06:00

my wings don't sail me to the sky
on my own these wings won't fly
Jesus told me so
still i'm not so sure that i know

can't find no rest for my soul
can't find no rest on my own
Jesus told me so
still i'm not so sure that i know

man the trouble is
we don't know who we are instead

i'll keep runnin' the other way
my heart ain't built to stay
my heart ain't built to stay
and the world just ain't that way

my heart ain't built to stay
my heart ain't built to stay
Jesus told me so

from the jars of clay cd "who we are instead"
words and music by
dan haseltine, charlie lowell, stephen mason, matt odmark, aaron sands
(c)2003 bridge building music, inc./pogostick music

an open letter

2004-11-15T15:52:00.000-06:00

i was watching "david letterman" last night. tom hanks was the guest and i was struck by his comments on last week's election. it was the first time that i heard an openly democratic supporter in hollywood say something humble and sensible about bush's reelection. he commented that while "their guy" lost, everything was going to be fine. he went on to say, much to my surprise, that what shocked those in the entertainment industry the most was the fact that they (the entertainers) are a group who is supposed to have their finger on the pulse of the culture from which they can entertain people, but -- and get this -- they couldn't believe how out of touch they really are!!! wow! bravo, mr. hanks, for seeing things the way they are.

this leads me to make some comments about what i want from my government.

let me begin by giving a brief profile of myself. i was born in 1964 and am latino. i grew up in a middle-class family and have a graduate-level education. my income is modest, not because anyone is holding me down, but because i have chosen a vocation in which financial security will always be elusive. which leads me to my first point.

for me, as an individual american voice, it's not about voting my pocketbook. to me, being an american is much, much more than that.

i have two kids, currently seven and nine. i want them to grow up in an america that does not determine it's course of action based on the almighty dollar. rather, i want them to grow up in a country where, first and foremost, they can sleep at night knowing that their government is bending over backwards to make sure that the finest military in the world has the training, equipment and personnel it needs to protect them.

perhaps more important than that, i want my children to grow up in a country that is not antagonistic to their faith as followers of Christ in any way. i am raising my children to be committed to the Bible and to following Jesus Christ. putting aside all of the big hair, gaudy, televangelist and right-wing stereotypes of christians, the person who is truly following a Biblical faith will be the best friend that any muslim, hindu, buddhist and even athiest can have. the true Biblical follower of Christ will be absolutely committed to following Christ as "the Way, the Truth and the Life," and make every effort to share that Good News with others, but will also be committed to defending anyone else's right to pursue their faith as they see fit. i want my kids to grow up in a country that does not begrudge them or limit their pursuit of that kind of faith.

i want my kids to grow up in a country where it's government cares for the less fortunate and downtrodden, not by enabling them to be dependent on government bailouts, but by believing in them enough to train them how to be everything they were created to be and getting to a place where they can challenge others to do the same.

i want my kids to grow up in a country where it's courts uphold the laws of the land, not figure out ways to bend and change those laws because they are inconvenient.

i want my kids to grow up in a country where those who break the law and violate the rights of others receive their due discipline.

i want my kids to grow up in a country that has a respect for our nation's heritage, with a view toward the challenges of the future; a country that understands that "tradition is the living faith of dead people" while "traditionalism is the dead faith of living people."

this is the country i hoped for as a kid and i hope my dear ones will live in.